Thoughts from the Mountain

Another day in beautiful Colorado and I am getting lots of writing done.   For those that don’t know I wrote a book’let’called Reflections from on the Water”.    It is an account of my trip to First Descents this summer and the lessons I learned.   If you would like a copy of this, please email me at allipalooza@gmail.com and I will gladly send you one.

I consider myself a very spiritual person but not necessarily a religious person.  I feel that my relationship with God is a private one and I try not to push it onto other people.   I will warn you ahead of time that this post is a about my spirituality.

This week marks the beginning of Lent.  I was a bad Christian and did not get to church on Ash Wednesday, but I did read the service in my Prayer Book.   It is the tradition in the Episcopal Church to give something up Lent or to take on a practice for Lent.    I had a priest once that said that you should only give up something that will help you get closer to your relationship with God.   Giving up the candy bar you eat as an afternoon snack may not bring you closer to God, but maybe donating the money you would have spend on the candy to a Christian outreach program will.  

Many times I have added meditation or devotionals to my daily practice and did find them helpful.   Several years ago when I was first diagnosed, I could not fathom taking on something else or giving something up, unless I could give up chemo. 

A couple of years ago a friend was driving me to Ash Wednesday service and asked me what I was giving up for Lent.   I sassily replied dying.   It was a smart mouth remark, but after I thought about it, I decided it was a good one.   It was not so much giving up dying, but giving up waiting for the cancer to kill me.   I continued that during last year’s Lent as well.

This year I pondered what I should give up.   Food and I are having a battle these days and as my stomach and I am at war regarding what I can and cannot eat.   The list is so short I can’t imagine giving up the few foods I can eat.  . 

What I decided to give up is saying I’m Sorry.      I learned at camp this summer that I tell people I’m sorry too much and it is truly because I am setting my expectations too high and feel I am letting people down.   In fact it is the opposite.   I do not ask for help enough.  So that is my other thing I am doing for lent.  I am going to start practicing Asking for help more often.    The reality is that people want to help, but truly do not know what to do unless you tell them.

Even if you are not a practicing Christian or observe Lent, I encourage each of you to ponder things that you might be able to give up or take on things that will bring you closer to yourself.

Support Allipalooza and get some cool gear.

It’s the first week of Allipalooza and I’m having a blast.    It snowed last night and I loved laying in bed and hearing the wind blow.   It’s a nice sound when you are inside at least.  

Several people have been asking me how they can help support Allipalooza.   Sending good vibes is the first thing, but I also have another way.   Last year I painted what I call my power symbol (the sun with the ying yang.    I have turned that symbol into my logo (see top left of my blog) and have created t-shirts and other gear for people to buy.  I tried to keep the pricing low and all proceeds will be split between supporting Allipalooza and First Descents. To access my cafepress store click here:  http://www.cafepress.com/allipalooza  

Between my regular fundraising for Team FD and the proceeds from the store, I am hoping to raise enough money to send two survivors to camp this year.  That is only $2,000 and every little bit helps.    Here is the link if you want to donate to my team in support of my 5k.  

http://teamfd.firstdescents.org/2011/fd/Lolli/Alli/ 

Peace and Love, 

Alli "Lolli" Ward

  If you do not hope and dream you will not discover what is beyond your limits and expectations.  --Unknown

 

Allipalooza, An Introduction

I’m sure many people are wondering what is Allipalooza.   The answer is simple.  Allipalooza is about exploration, challenge, adventure and self discovery.  Allipalooza is not purely about doing something, but also self-evaluation, reflection, identifying dreams and hopes.

Last year I had an awakening, a time that I realized that I was no longer living life, but simply coasting.  That is no way to live and especially for someone who has beaten the odds and is still alive. 

At this point I do not know what the future brings for me, or even how long that future is, but that is where Allipalooza comes in.   I have dedicated 2012 to finding out what I want to do with the rest of my life.    I am trying not to have any preconceived notions what that is.   In order to carry out the mission of Allipalooza,  I am embarking on a journey - A journey of travels, challenges, self reflection, writing and most of all staying away from the comfortable.

I have many great trips and events planned for the sole purpose of experiencing as much as I can and turning those experiences into discernment of the future.

On Monday I started the first adventure of Allipalooza.   I am spending the next two weeks in Colorado visiting friends, appreciating the views, experiencing the outdoors, and reacquainting myself with my hopes and dreams.     I have set simple obtainable goals for the next two weeks, although if I do not obtain them, I am not going to beat myself up, but to accept where the journey takes me.

View from the Deck

Future adventures include Las Vegas;  a road trip around the southwest to Bryce, Zion, and the Grand Canyon;  First Descents camp with a road trip around Montana and ending  the summer at Burning Man.  I am sure that more adventures are to come, but the travels are not the only adventure.   I am walking a 5k on March 11^th only three weeks away (gulp).   I have been planning to walk a 5k since last summer, but injuries and other health issues caused this challenge to be delayed.   Being only nine weeks out of knee surgery a 5k is a bit of a stretch, but it is not finishing, it is about challenging myself enough to try.   

A true challenge is one that you don’t know if you can accomplish, but are willing to take the risk and put yourself out there even though you may not succeed.   However, I believe that not succeeding is not failure.   Failure in my book is not even trying and not learning anything.   Anytime you challenge yourself whatever the results are you learn something and that learning shapes your future endeavors. 

I invite anyone that is local (Maryland) to join me in walking my 5k and cheer me on whatever the end result may be.   If you are interested email at Allipalooza@gmail.com

You can follow my updates here or on Twitter @THEAllipalooza

I hope that you too will reflect upon your dreams and put yourself out there is 2012 to make at least one of them come true.

Peace and Love,

Alli “Lolli” Ward